It’s been a long time. I have the usual excuses and they are truths, too. I got discouraged. By nature, I’m a poet (of sorts). I ‘see’ things with a rhythm, so when I try to write about something, any subject, it just doesn’t come out the way I see it because in the ‘just writing’ I lose the rhythm in which I originally felt (saw) the subject.
And, I got discouraged because of what’s happening in our country. It hit me like a ton of bricks. Oh, we had plenty of time to see it coming but, like any good ostrich, I didn’t think the tornado would land, not near. And, it harkened back to old and terrible memories of living experiences where freedom is not freedom for everyone. It brought up negative feelings that I didn’t want to have and couldn’t seem to let go.
I have a little Westie (West Highland white terrier), she is now 11 1/2. We adopted Ruby in 2009. She was a rescue, lived her 3 1/2 years in a cage with 20 other dogs. Ruby is what her trainer called ‘tender’ because she had such sweetness and tenderness about her. Ruby is not a fearful or cowering dog, she can be bossy and she does have good, strong ‘dog instincts’ but she has this tenderness, even the trainer noticed. So. . .
One day, early morning, I was making tea and toast. Ruby loved the smell of the peach tea and she does have a penchant for buttered toast. We went out on the deck and shared our tea and toast. She was so happy, she was ‘wiggly’. I looked at her and saw the answer. I also heard (in my mind) some very wise words of George Harrison. When the Beatles were breaking up, there were hard feelings among these still young men. Later, as a result of his meditation practice and maturity, he said that it wasn’t a problem among the four of them, but that they were growing up, changing, ‘leaving home’. They evolved in their age, maturity, desires, talents and it was an exciting, scary, hard thing to grow up and away from what you have known and loved.
Things change, they must. People, neighborhoods, countries, governments. It can make you scared, angry, sad–all of these, before you even realize why you feel this way. That’s what was happening to me. I knew, deep inside, this is a great time of change. I’m witnessing an incredible evolution. It’s been coming but we’ve been looking the other way, hoping to be distracted, wanting things to remain the same. But, the same isn’t working anymore– for anyone.
I decided I can follow the endless bitter backlash (both sides), daily dumping of the latest fear/complaint; or, I can do what I want to be, what I hope to believe in. Tea and toast with love and kindness. I don’t disregard the need to participate and pay attention. I just choose how I do that. I protest by finding every thing that I can do that is helpful to respect and dignity of self and others. I do that. I search ‘for the helpers’ as Mr. Rogers’ mother advised him to do in times of trouble. They are there. There are some marvelous things going on. Educators, scientists, engineers, billionaires, little folk like me: Using all the resources they can bring to encourage, uplift, to help self and others, to evolve because that’s what is happening. We can become aware, more aware that this is what we’re in the middle of and make a positive peaceful difference.
I’m choosing Tea and Toast with Kindness (a registered name), because my Ruby said so.